POCKETS

As a fellow of a few years I have watched styles come and go. My short hair of the early 70’s was spurned by most every one of my peers most of whom sported the long, even shoulder-length hair. Yet look around today. Young folks have their hair cropped to nothing. The longer haired folks are the older ones. Blah, blah, blah – we’ve all heard it and thought it.

Okay. POCKETS – Shirt Pockets to be more particular. Where have they gone? Walk into a Walmart or Bealle’s and into the shirt department. Just try to find a slip over shirt or casual shirt with a pocket.

That is my only criteria when I shop. To heck with color, style – don’t even really care if my wife likes it or not.

It’s the pockets. I tour the racks with one goal – one quest. A shirt pocket. Find me a shirt with a nice pocket around on the chest.

Do the young folks, for whom it seems like everything is made, not need them?

Hey guys – are you familiar with pens? Yea – those things you write with. Oh, texting on your PDA is the way it is done today – I see. Well not for all of us!

And, you young folks might not understand this, but GLASSES.

I have become a bit conspiratorial these days. What I think is that the American Optometric Association is in collusion with the shirt makers of China. It is a known fact that when you don’t have a shirt pocket eye-glasses get put in strange places which leads to L – O – S – T !!.

It’s gotten so bad with me that I believe I spend about 7.245 minutes per day (on average) looking for my glasses. That is over 44 hours per year looking for my glasses. And when the day comes (and quickly it might) when I can’t find them – well – see what I mean. It’s got to be a conspiracy.

Well actually I only buy shirts with pockets so, admittedly, there must be that minor point that I sometimes (often) forget (thinking about something else) to put my glasses in my pockets (the bed is so convenient when I’m changing shirts).

Oh well – it’s still my theory. Conspiracy theories don’t need proof.

None-the-less, I am on the warpath for pockets. We need to form a “Shirts with Pockets” coalition. We need to march Washington (well actually Beijing) and demand what is right and warranted.

Especially we older dudes who still write with a pen and need glasses to see what the heck we are writing.